7 Things I Learned About Myself This Thanksgiving: Finding Magic in the Sad Moments

I started Thanksgiving feeling… empty.

The house smelled of roasted turkey, pumpkin pie, and cinnamon, but I couldn’t shake the heaviness in my chest. The bright lights, the laughter echoing from the kitchen, even the familiar clatter of forks on plates — it all felt distant.

I wanted to feel festive, to smile, to be “present,” but the truth was: I didn’t feel like it.

And then I realised something profound: thanksgiving isn’t about the day itself. It’s about the lens we choose to see it through.

Sometimes, magic doesn’t just appear. Sometimes, you have to create it. Sometimes, you have to fake a little warmth, a little gratitude, a little joy… until it actually takes root.

By the end of the day, I had shifted — not magically, not all at once, but slowly, deliberately, intentionally. I noticed the little things I had overlooked. I realised how much I had to look forward to. And I found gratitude even in the quiet corners of sadness.

Here’s what this Thanksgiving taught me about myself.

1. It’s Okay to Start in Sadness

I had to let myself feel the low before I could move forward.

Acknowledging my sadness wasn’t weakness. It was honesty. And once I sat with it — without judgment — I realised the heaviness didn’t have to define the day. I could choose what I added to it.

Sometimes, the first step to joy is giving yourself permission to feel anything at all.

2. Gratitude Doesn’t Always Come Naturally — You Can Create It

At first, I couldn’t find anything to be thankful for. And then I remembered: gratitude can be a practice, not a feeling.

I wrote down small things:

• The smell of fresh bread

• My dog napping quietly by the fireplace

• The warmth of my own mug in my hands

By focusing on tiny sparks of life around me, I slowly noticed the bigger picture: I have so much to look forward to, if only I allow myself to see it.

3. Joy Can Be Faked — Until You Actually Feel It

I smiled at my little cousin when he passed me a plate. I laughed at my uncle’s corny joke. I sang along softly to the holiday music.

And you know what? Faking it didn’t feel fake for long.Sometimes, joy is a muscle we need to exercise.Sometimes, you have to put on the costume before you really become the festive person inside.

4. The Magic Is Already Everywhere — We Just Need to Notice It

By mid-afternoon, I started to notice little miracles:

• The way the sunlight hit the leaves outside

• The laugh of someone I love

• The warmth of the oven still lingering in the kitchen

Magic isn’t something you wait for. It’s something you create — by looking, by noticing, by choosing to see it.

5. There’s So Much to Look Forward To

As I cleaned up the kitchen and sipped my last cup of tea, I realised that sadness is temporary, but anticipation is infinite.

I thought about:

• The new year approaching

• My own personal goals

• Friends I want to reconnect with

• Adventures I’ve yet to take

Even in a quiet, heavy moment, there’s always something to look forward to. Sometimes, it’s just a question of shifting your focus from what’s behind to what’s ahead.

6. Connection Doesn’t Have to Be Perfect

Thanksgiving can feel like a high-pressure day — everyone laughing, sharing, taking photos. But I learned that real connection is messy, imperfect, and doesn’t need to be Instagram-worthy.

It’s in:

• Sitting with someone quietly

• A shared joke over burnt stuffing

• Listening, without trying to fix anything

• Letting someone know you see them

The magic of people isn’t in perfection; it’s in showing up.

7. Self-Reflection Is the True Feast

By the end of the day, I had learned something bigger than gratitude for the meal or the gifts: I had learned gratitude for myself.

I had survived sadness. I had shifted my perspective. I had chosen joy, little by little.

Thanksgiving reminded me: we are capable of creating our own magic. We just need to notice the small moments, fake it a little if needed, and actively choose what we want to grow.

Final Thoughts

If you’re reading this and your Thanksgiving was quiet, lonely, or hard, know this: you are not alone. The magic of the season doesn’t have to be delivered to you — you can make it yourself.

Start small: notice the warmth, smile at someone, sip something comforting, write down what you’re looking forward to.

By creating these little sparks, you might just find that sadness lifts — and joy, connection, and hope begin to take root.

Love Arlyn