6 Signs You’ve Got the Ick—And This Relationship Is Doomed

Because once the ick hits, it rarely goes away…

Being in a relationship is wonderful—when it's good. But when it's not, there's a subtle shift that creeps in and suddenly everything they do makes your skin crawl. Enter: the ick

You didn’t mean to get it. Maybe it started with the way they chewed, texted, or talked to waitstaff. But now? The ick has taken over, and if you’re being brutally honest with yourself, it might be time to call it quits.

If you’re constantly asking, “Is this just a phase… or am I done?”, here are the six major signs you’ve got the ick—and that your relationship might be on borrowed time.

1. You No Longer Care How You Look Around Them

Remember those early days? Perfect outfits, fresh hair, maybe even a spritz of perfume before every date. Now, you roll up in mismatched pajamas and unwashed hair without a second thought. If you don’t care how they perceive you—or worse, you actively want them to find you unattractive—it’s more than comfort. It’s emotional detachment.

2. The Thought of a Future Together Makes You Feel… Nothing

When you’ve emotionally checked out, the future with your partner feels more like a trap than a dream. If talks of moving in, meeting family, or planning a holiday together make you feel indifferent or claustrophobic, take notice. Your lack of excitement isn’t random—it’s a flashing warning sign.

3. Physical Intimacy Feels Forced (or Non-Existent)

Let’s get real: if you actively avoid physical closeness—or worse, feel uncomfortable at the idea of being touched—it’s not just a low libido. It’s emotional and physical disconnection. And in most relationships, when attraction fades, connection follows.

4. Their Inner Circle Exhausts You

You used to make an effort with their family or friends. Now? You’re dodging invites and praying for last-minute cancellations. If spending time with their people feels like a chore, it’s often a sign you’re pulling away from them, too.

5. Every Interaction Feels Like a Scoreboard

If you find yourself mentally keeping track of who texted first or who paid last, your relationship has turned into a tit-for-tat battle. Healthy couples give freely—emotionally and physically. Once you start keeping receipts, it’s a sign something deeper is off.

6. Their Quirks? Straight Up Cringe Now

What was once “cute” now makes you want to disappear. Their laugh? Nails on a chalkboard. Their jokes? Borderline unbearable. When their existence starts to irritate you, it’s not just a bad week. It’s your gut telling you something’s wrong.

Bonus Signs: Because the Ick Rarely Comes Alone

• You fantasize about being single—or with literally anyone else.

• You feel relieved when they cancel plans.

• You Google “how to know when to break up” way too often.

Sometimes, we already know the truth. We’re just waiting for permission to say it out loud.

Final Thoughts: If the Ick Is Loud, Listen

The ick isn’t shallow. It’s not “just a phase.” It’s your body and your mind rejecting what no longer aligns with you.

You don’t need a “big reason” to leave. The ick is the reason.

And as hard as it feels now, breaking up might be the best thing you do for your future self. Because once you make space in your life, you might just find someone who makes you feel excited again—not icked out.

Love Arlyn